Divorcing My Value From My Work

March 8, 2016 Lindsey

Photo found on Pexels.

They sneak around together behind my back. I have been really intentional about keeping them apart before. But they get together when I’m not paying attention. They started hooking up and before I knew it they were married. I actually figured out they were married when some things changed and I tried to divorce them.

It’s really freaking dangerous when my value hooks up with my work. We all struggle with it. Many even encourage it. But it’s a slippery slope. We were never meant to marry our value to our work.

Our work changes. Circumstances change. People change. Markets change. Management changes. Winds blow one way, then another. Entropy is natural. Work is not dependable. Our ability to work is not always in our control.

Placing our value in something that changes is like building a house on a sand dune - not safe for the house.

So what’s the best way to keep my value from hooking up with my work? Marrying my value to another, more faithful, caring lover.

Dealing with Anxiety - for Business Owners & Humans In General

August 5, 2015 Lindsey

Original photo from Gratisography.

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, nor do I play one on TV, so take this with a grain of salt. This is for informational purposes only and is my personal experience.

Happiness based on ignorance is fleeting; but joy based on truth is sustaining.

I have experienced anxiety and depression. More this past winter than I have in 14 years.

And it’s not easy and it’s not pretty.

But the reality of it is, I’m glad that I dig in and deal with it. It’s better than numbing and waiting for it to resurface later.

I think a lot of us are happy based on our circumstances. We bury the things that bother us and live in the physical. The surface-y. The tasks. Then something comes along and blindsides us and our ability to keep it all locked in (nice and tight) is torn from us. And our insides are now on the surface and we have to deal with it.

It’d be much better if our peace was based on something unchangeable, wouldn’t it?

It’d be so nice if we didn’t feel like we had to run to numbing agents.

It’d be so nice if we could live life with our hearts, our hope, our value, our purpose based on something that would always satisfy.

I want something, someone, who will last forever. I want someone who will love me, unending, forever. I want something even death can’t end.

And I’ve found it. In Jesus.

Yeah, I dropped that bomb.

And I don’t want to be a pusher. You know I can’t stand spam. I want everyone to choose whatever they choose because they’ve thought critically about it. Because they trust and believe in it for themselves.

Yet, here I am with gold. I know, now more than ever, how much it’s needed. And I can’t sit here and hold it away from you.

Jesus isn’t some magic bullet that kills all the pain, forever. Hardly. But He is there. And sometimes that’s more than enough. “Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence?” (Psalm 139:7)

The reality of it is, is that I can’t write about how to deal with anxiety without explaining to you the only thing that has brought me hope, peace and comfort in my life. It is Him.

It’s not a set of prayers. It’s not attending church. It’s not a routine.

There are things that have helped ease symptoms in my life - like waking up earlier, running, music and writing. But if I rely on those alone, I still feel the fear, despair and hopelessness continue to hum below the surface.

But God sparks hope. He gives me truth that contradicts all the lies I’ve internalized, relied on and lived by. I don’t have to become them anymore. I am free with His truth.

And so, this post is nothing but an offering to you.

It’s not a contract. It’s not a standard. It’s not dogmatic. It’s simply an offer of my experience.

You have a different life than me. I can’t comprehend what it’s like to experience your life. But I do know who is there for me. And so I just wanted to let you know he is there for you too.

Because it’s really freaking hard and scary to base your worth, your purpose, your hope and your peace on something that may not last - like a business, a relationship or family.

I want something that’s forever. Thank God He found me.

***Though God and his truth has been VITAL to me in my life, I’m not downplaying the potential need for medicines. I’ve read and agree with some stuff from Jamie - the very worst missionary and I totally get that sometimes your biology gets jacked and meds are needed.

What I Know & What I don't - A short list

August 1, 2015 Lindsey

Original photo by Death To The Stock Photo.

It’s been 1 (calendar) year since I’ve starting writing on here.
Things will be (at least somewhat) different going-forward on this-here blog. You can’t really take a month hiatus and not re-evaulate and change, right?
This Week’s Gold is going to be different and/or eliminated. I’m thinking This Month’s Gold is a possibility. It’s not that I don’t want to share quality content, it’s that I want to limit the stream of voices in my head, so I need to cut down on the endless Internet click-bait to do so.
I’ve been all over the place with writing this past year, mostly worried about what ya’ll (yes, the South is wearing me down) think of me & what you want to read. I now feel like screw that, I’m going to write what I want to, or rather what I think I should, instead of writing out of fear of what you want/think. (Plus, I haven’t done a good job pleasing you this past year anyhow, so why not try something else?)
I still love quotes. I don’t know if that means they’ll still be weekly, but they’ve gotta make an appearance, because I so respect people that can concisely cut to my heart with a single line.
The older I get, the shorter the list gets of things I’m absolutely sure of.
I still love writing. I’ve missed it. I need it. This is my therapy.
Approx. 1-3 people actually care about anything I’ve written in points 1-7. And that’s okay, because sometimes you just need to pour yourself out, whether anyone values it or not.

Tolino - out.

Communication & July Hiatus

July 3, 2015 Lindsey

Original photo by Jay Mantri.

I think communication is really important. Like, paramount.

I’ve had so many experiences where communication has dispelled fears, healed relationships and built beautiful things. Without communication, things get weird or worse. It’s guaranteed. Because instead of knowing where someone is coming from, we just assume. Which never goes well.

So, I want to communicate where I’m coming from…

I started out almost a year ago doing small business consulting and writing this blog. And I’ve loved it. I still do. But I’ve changed a lot along the way. And recently, understanding love and sacrifice has been a big part of it.

I want to give as I’ve been generously given to. I think I’m just beginning to understand the importance of humility and sacrifice for others. I want to understand and explore love and sacrifice more. Not in the interwebs. But in real, face-to-face life.

Additionally, I’ve been struggling to separate my value from my work. My value isn’t determined by my performance. I know it. But it’s a struggle.

Plus, I have a heap of beautiful faces to see and spend time with this month. I don’t want to miss a second of opportunity to love them.

All this adds up to me taking a July hiatus from this-here blog. It’s happening.

I also invite you to explore love, sacrifice and where your value is tied this month as well.

Leave me any questions or thoughts & have a wonderful month friends!

Investing in your most valuable assets

July 1, 2015 Lindsey

Original photo by Matthew Wiebe.

A lesson about shrewd business from an ancient parable:

“Jesus told his disciples: “There was a rich man whose manager was accused of wasting his possessions. So he called him in and asked him, ‘What is this I hear about you? Give an account of your management, because you cannot be manager any longer.’

“The manager said to himself, ‘What shall I do now? My master is taking away my job. I’m not strong enough to dig, and I’m ashamed to beg— I know what I’ll do so that, when I lose my job here, people will welcome me into their houses.’

“So he called in each one of his master’s debtors. He asked the first, ‘How much do you owe my master?’

“‘Nine hundred gallons of olive oil,’ he replied.

“The manager told him, ‘Take your bill, sit down quickly, and make it four hundred and fifty.’

“Then he asked the second, ‘And how much do you owe?’

“‘A thousand bushels of wheat,’ he replied.

“He told him, ‘Take your bill and make it eight hundred.’

“The master commended the dishonest manager because he had acted shrewdly. ”

— Luke 16:1-8

Though the manager wasn’t trustworthy in how he cared for his master’s assets, he understood this one simple truth - investing in relationships is key.

He gave people a break on their debts so that they’d take care of him when he lost his job. His motivation to invest in relationships was selfish. Even though he did it selfishly, he demonstrated how valuable this truth was to his life.

No organization, business or asset moves itself. People move them. So it makes sense that we should focus on investing in relationships, not in things, right?

Yet, relationships are difficult to prioritize. Relationships easily take a backseat to our tasks, don’t they?

Even greater than that, the risk is bigger when we invest in relationships. People can up and leave and take our hearts with them.

But this I know without a doubt, a life lived investing in others is beautiful.

Knowing you’ve served and loved and cared for others is gratifying.

It’s still hard. It’s hard to put your tasks aside to riskily invest in people. But time and time again, I’m convinced that it’s worth it - not just from a gratifying, moral standpoint, but also from a business one.

Our tasks only have meaning because they are serving people. It reminds me of the first episode of The Last Man on Earth - what’s the point of your tasks, unless you are serving people with them?

Let's not miss opportunities to invest in relationships because we're too task-oriented.

After all, the tasks only have purpose because of people.

Let's prioritize the most valuable assets we possess - relationships.

Talent vs. Skill

June 24, 2015 Lindsey

Original photo from Death To The Stock Photo.

Talent is something you’re born with. Skill is something you refine.

I watched Brittany Allen perform last night on America’s Got Talent.

She was the perfect example of inherent talent. But she didn’t demonstrate refined skill in her performance.

It seemed like she lacked the 10,000 hours Macklemore talked about. You know, those 10,000 hours that ensure mastery of a skill.

If you read James Altucher’s post Snoop Dog for CEO of Twitter from this past This Week's Gold, you may have noticed mastery was a theme. In fact, Point F showed how Snoop understood the difference between talent and skill. It seems like all the greats do. They all inherently had talent, but the greats were great because of their skill.

The skilled are the champs.

Though Brittany Allen got by last night on her talent alone, we may not be so lucky. Let’s refine our talents. Let’s put those 10,000 hours in.

We already have talent. Let’s get skilled.

Fighting the "Basic" Lie

June 17, 2015 Lindsey

Original photo by Ryan McGuire.

You’ve heard about being “basic” right? In the past month, I’ve seen both a random stranger and a good friend identify themselves as “basic”. And I hate it.

I get it. You have interests that are common with the majority, but who the heck wants to be identified as basic? It’s like saying, “Hi, I’m ordinary. There’s thousands of others like me. I’m a dime a dozen.” Of course, you’re not really saying that. But you’re admitting to some degree of it. And that’s heartbreaking.

I know being basic is a joke. I know I may be taking it too seriously. But it also falls into the category of stereotypes. You know - the mental constructs that allows for everything from off-handed comments about girls being basic the whole way to justifications for horrific racist actions.

It’s fine to joke. But it’s not fine to think of yourself or anyone else as basic.

Because if you really think you’re basic, then it’s hard to believe that you have something unique to offer the world. And you do. You are incredibly unique and the world needs what you have.

If you think you’re basic, not only do you not have to think you’re unique, you also don’t have to share your uniqueness. Thinking you're basic is a lie that binds you to keeping the world from knowing you in all your uniqueness.

It’s fine to love Starbucks, Taylor Swift and The Notebook. But it’s not fine to think you’re “basic”.

You're the rarest diamond. Don't hold back that sparkle by believing the lie that you're "basic".

There Is Always Opportunity

June 15, 2015 Lindsey

This is always true. It might not be the opportunity you're looking for. It might not be easy, but there is always opportunity.

Chaos makes us reactionary. For some, it incites fear and stress. It's understandable. We generally want comfort, reliability and predictability. Not chaos.

Yet, we don't need to scorn chaos. It holds opportunity. And opportunity holds hope for change. Hope for making something better.

It's hard to deny fear and stress when we're in chaos. But if we can step back and evaluate the situation, we may see an opportunity. Which can change everything.

A Simple Way To Revolutionize Your To-Do List

June 12, 2015 Lindsey

Original photo by Death to the Stock Photo.

Is your to-do list kind-of a pain?

Sure, it's nice to keep everything written down, organized and ready to be checked it off. But sometimes a to-do list can be overwhelming, boring or even feel pointless.

When my to-do list is long, I get overwhelmed. Then, I tend to procrastinate. Other times, my list isn’t even that long, but it bores me to have my day mapped out. Worse than that, sometimes when I look at my to-do list, I feel hopeless because I don’t know if the tasks will even make a difference in the big picture.

Then a few weeks ago, I was humbled and came back to what matters most - loving others. And I started to see my to-do list not as tasks I had to complete, but rather as opportunities to love others.

So this is the simple way to revolutionize your to-do list -

Write next to each task who you're loving through it.

When I’ve forced myself to write down who is loved by each task, I find that tasks that I didn’t think of as important to loving others actually are. Take doing laundry for example - having clean clothes of course loves others through my appearance (and lack of smelliness). But less obviously, having clean clothes in my closet means I can get dressed quicker and with less stress, which means I can spend more quality time with others.

If you are at odds with your to-do list, give it a try. It’s a simple fix that could revolutionize how you view your work.

The Marriage of Rank & Responsibility

June 8, 2015 Lindsey

I have been a fool when I have wanted to be the leader so things could be done my way. Because the only power you receive when you lead is to serve.

When I was a child, I heard phrases like "because I said so" and "when you're grown up you can do it how you want". Instead of learning in humble wisdom, my thoughts rebelled, "yeah, I'll do it MY way when I'm grown."

I've had many experiences since where I thought my way was better, but I was forced to submit to those in charge. All this welled up in me to create a desire for leadership so I could do things MY way. So foolish.

Because leadership isn't a place to impose our ideas and rule on others. Leadership is responsibility to serve others and look out for their best interests. The best leaders get this. And I hope we're like them.

Let's not be foolish enough to try to divorce rank and responsibility. They're meant for each other.

Oh and if you're looking for more motivational, leadership and business quotes, you can check out my pinterest board of curated quotes below -

Follow Lindsey's board Business Quotes on Pinterest.

To: Business Owners

A lesson about shrewd business from an ancient parable:

So this is the simple way to revolutionize your to-do list -